So, I’ve been taking this Anxiety And Stress (minimizing) Course through my local Doctors Office… On the other side of the fence, I’ve been viciously fighting with my neighbour.
Ok, first maybe understand this: my type of personality unless I’m offended right off the bat, is one that has to be pushed–I warn–pushed–I warn again; and so on until you offend my children and then, well, I snap!
Neighbour and I have surpassed the snap stage and its turned into a tit for tat full out rivalry! Shes put my dogs poop bags into my mail box, I opened her important mail to let the rain soak it; and so on an so on…even further back, I AM NOT THIS TYPE of PERSON! At all! Only my ex-could get me so upset to accidentally drop a tooth brush in cat dropping box, and yes, you guessed it, put it back! NEVER my neighbours. We always make friends and we WERE–until she crossed the line and involved my children. End of friendship, period.
Back to class, I have been understanding, participating, sharing and taking my inventory, the ways they have taught us but, I have been holding back this rivalry. Like I am ashamed or don’t want to be found out. At 330am I was awoken out of my bed by the usual stomping above, I messaged her to ‘please be quiet’. See, still I try. Her response was “please f/&; off” and banged her heavy foot on our home ceiling. I immediately went upstairs and it turned into an obvious confrontation. Again.
Then, I realized AFTER all our shouting an her stomping, the kids were still sound asleep. I thought about WHO REALLY had been harmed during this time?
Her. And, I.
That was the consistent factor when I thought about our fights–its her & I whom are getting hurt.
Look, if the Lord has taught my big mouth anything, its how to FORGIVE. (Not forget). And as I sat, I continued to purge through the anger in my head with God; I asked how to stop this from happening anymore? The stress of it is causing us both further physical emotional upset, these are our homes and we need PEACE–no matter WHO’s right or wrong. I thought about the outline in my homework from my course and went through my colomns of behaviours–got to the last column where it asks What Should You Do differently; the answer came:
Immediately, I sent her a message asking her to meet me in the lobby and she did. I set my Pride to the side, all the anger, frustration, and hardest the fact that I am in the ‘right’ and, she has hurt me more–aside; and I apologized first. It has freed me from much upset, it feels much better to have the air feeling lighter, and my heart as well. all of us have an ego. all of us. The ego I believe is the human condition. With much consistent work, and dedication to your spirit and relationship with the Lord, it can be at least well, tamed.
The Dawn of my New Day started my morning in an act of responsibility and integrity with Jesus.
I use the word ‘Act’ because there is a difference between saying, thinking, writing, and actually taking action on a thought, to change your own behaviors.
How have you started your day with the Lord?
(Hopefully YOU had no neighbours jumping on your head;)! Lol!
If this is all I get to post this Easter weekend–have a safe and blessed holiday,